Nine

Today is Husby's and my ninth anniversary. We have no special plans. We have three small children. I couldn't find the greeting card section at Whole Foods today, so I think I will be making him a card. I went through an old journal the other day, and I pressed some flowers from Tanzania and Kenya when we visited there immediately after we were engaged in 1998. I'll paste those to his card, and write to him how much I love him.

Without trying to sound ridiculous, we are a good couple. Of course, life wedges itself between us. Three kids, discipline, chores, his job, my 24/7 job of motherhood, our families, friends, a mortgage, being tired, being stressed....all these things wear us down. But we -- he and I as people and together -- are really a gift to one another and to others. We worked with this guy who once told us we had the 'KWAN', as in the Cuba Gooding, Jr. character telling Jerry Maguire he is the ambassador of kwan. I have no idea what the official definition of kwan might be, but as for Husby and me, I like to think that it means we love what's real, we cherish the authentic, we love and respect all life. We are comfortable with ourselves and with almost anyone else. We care to put others at ease. We try to make other belong. We try to be better. And we accept ourselves as we are. We bring that out in one another.

Our dream is to one day live again in the small town where we lived when we were first married, in Northern California. To have just enough of a house, clean and bright. To have land, and a big garden. To work outside. To cook together again. To welcome our families away from the stresses of their lives into the life we value and love.

So here's to nine good years, G. Here's to us. Keep the dreams and the memories fresh. Be mindful of the beauty of our days now. I love you.

Meme

Never done one of these things for the public. This ought to be good, what with Husby traveling to Napa Valley for a customer meeting....poor, poor hardworking, self-sacrificing soul.....; his college-ex-girlfriend crashing at my house for two nights; his parents in-town but sorta hedging on just when exactly they'll be hanging with their grandchildren; and my generally piss poor attitude today. Some days are JUST ....here it goes.... .

Where is your cell phone? In the Blue Bag.
Your significant other? On his way to the airport. Bastard.
Your hair? Ponytail.
Your mother? Making supper in Atlanta, worrying over my brothers
Your father? In the basement, drinking his wine, so he doesn't worry over my brothers
Your favorite thing? Silence.
Your dream last night? For the baby to go back to sleep.
Your favorite drink? coffee and/ or water
Your dream/goal? Living in peace on my own land with my own food growing behind my kitchen.
The room you’re in? The kitchen/ at the deskish thing.
Your ex(s)? Still pining for me, surely.
Your fear? Dying some tragic death and not raising my children
Where do you want to be in 6 years? See "the dream/ goal".
Where were you last night? Payson, AZ, eating supper looking over the Mogollon Rim
What you’re not? Weak
Muffins? Not my favorite, and let's be honest....they're cake without the icing.
One of your wish list items? diamond stud earrings; a trip to St. John USVI; a babysitter on-demand
Where you grew up? Atlanta and Mobile, Alabama
The last thing you did? Said good-bye to my husband who, again, is going on a strenuous "business trip" to Napa Valley
What are you wearing? Orange Lilly polo shirt; denim skirt.
Your TV? Only one, in the den, not on.
Your pets? Animals are for eating.
Your computer? Dell laptop. Almost was a Mac.
Your life? A million roles, at the service of many others.
Your mood? Irritated. Obviously, PMSing.
Missing someone? No
Your car? 2002 Volvo XC...rockin' it in Snottsdale, Land o' the rim-encusted Hummer and Escalade
Something you’re not wearing? shoes.
Favorite store? Many, many favorites.
Your summer? Hoping to bag the extended family visits in favor of someplace quiet with just my own family.
Favorite color? Green
When is the last time you laughed? Last night
Last time you cried? Any minute...see "mood'!

Taxing

I hope everyone was able to file their taxes on-time. We took care of that chore a few weeks ago, so there's one less thing to worry about.

My eldest and youngest are having birthdays in less than a month. For Kindergarten Boy, we invited his whole (15 count) class to a low-key pizza and cake party at one the the best pizza places in the Valley (in the U.S., actually). It will be quick, manageable, and best of all far far from my home. My mom will be in-town for it. The baby's First Birthday is the cause of a large celebration at our house. We are not calling it a First Birthday, but we will be celebrating dear friends and family who have aided us and helped us through the joyful and EXHAUSTING First Year. I am hoping to have a catered pig roast. We'll see if I can find a good caterer who will do it. And do it well!

The latest drama in the life of Kindergarten Boy was having a core group of Kindergarten girls asking him to 'show his private parts'. Dear God. He tends to start pulling his pants down sometimes before he makes it around the corner of the boys' room, and believe me those sassy little girls noticed. Well, after I got pulled into the school counselor's office to talk with Kindergarten Boy about his behavior, we never had another problem. Poor kid. He was so embarrassed, but you live and learn. And being a Mom, I tried to make him feel better after school. We went to the store and I let him choose a 'Better' cookie....to help make it Better. But he's still getting the 'requests'. I alerted his teacher. I talked with a couple friends who also have Kindergartners. And wow, did I get a diatribe on the Mean Girls and Queen Bees of the Kindergarten.

What? Wait now. These are 5 and 6 year olds. Are they really already clique-y and socially insecure? Already? I didn't notice or even worry about that idea until I was in maybe 5th grade. The END of 5th grade!!! How sad. Do other moms in other schools witness this new social classism so young? If being a pesky snotty girl who wants to grow up way too quickly is what is required to be the 'Queen Bee' of elementary school, then please Jesus let my children be well-mannered, kind, friendly social outcasts (WHO ACT LIKE CHILDREN). Who cares. Obviously, they will. But it's my job to make sure they grow up well, and strong, with a good sense of themselves. Their peers are so influential. And it's just the beginning. I know.

Preschool Boy and I and another mom and a friend visited the Zoo yesterday. The boys were filthy by the end of the day. They loved it. They loved the boa constrictor and the iguanas. And of course the stingrays.

Baby Girl is fine, sweet as always, starting to wear her new crop of warm weather outfits. My favorite might be her birthday outfit: a swing top with big pink bows at the shoulders, little knee bloomers (with more pink bows), and an appliqued cake with one candle and her name on it. My dear God, it's the visual definition of precious.

We'll also be hosting a wine tasting, which we auctioned off for a charity thing. It's next weekend, and we're excited for the food and the wine! My mom will be arrving just in time to 'crash' the event. She deserves a pile of good times, and I know she'll have a blast and charm all the other guests.

Favorite Things

Out here in the desert, I crave anything green, lush and full of life. A bowl of Granny Smith apples, a watered houseplant, the new, sweet little finds above.

The shoes are adorable. They go perfectly with denim or khaki, and especially a white blouse or a little lightweight white spring sweater.

And the cherries are the border for Baby Girl's First Birthday Celebration. We don't 'do' First Birthday Parties in this house. We DO say Thank You in the most grateful and fun manner possible to our friends and families who have supported us through a child's First Year. We throw a big party in honor of them, to toast their love and care, and to pat ourselves on the backs. We survived the year. All of us, together. Let's celebrate.

I am going to need to put together a menu for about 18-20 adults, plus offspring, for our gathering in a few weeks. I'll also bake a cake, and pull it out as a surprise toward the end so we can sing to the little one. Menu suggestions are welcome. We want to keep it light, fun, yummy, and memorable.

Home Again

We were so thrilled to return home to our sunny abode. Spring is a perfect time of year out here, and our big bright house with its big windows was welcome after a Midatlantic downtown area, with its crowds and grime. The boys and the baby and I spent almost all day outside in our sweet smelling backyard yesterday.

We have (yet another) nest in our front entryway this year. Last year, a little bird built her nest in our Easter wreath. This year in our pot holding a Sago Palm. This is of course sweet and cute now, but when the eggs hatch there is bird poop all over the place. EWWWW. I'll be cleaning the vestibule with hot water and bleach once more.

I survived the wedding and didn't stand up to object. I am worried about them. Full disclosure. They seem happy, but I see too many potential problems. Again, for now, I want to give everyone the benefit of the doubt and chalk my feelings up to big-sisterly love :). My mother is driving me nuts because she's basically displacing all her frustrations and worry over this union onto everyone else.: Baby Girl's nose was running...what's wrong with her; why didn't I take my wee children out of the room when the loud band started up; her brother bothers her; her mother bothers her; my husband didn't do enough (???); she wants my children near her all to herself, but she quickly got bored with them. She was a mess. My brother came to see her in his tux prior to the ceremony, and she cried like a baby girl. I adore my mother, but she's really struggling with this, more than I am.

Now that everyone thinks (knows?) my own family is completely crazy, I must (as always) run to get Preschool Boy ready for Montessori and out the door. Anyway, whose family isn't completely crazy? I read somewhere that when a baby is born into a family, the birth is not the miracle. The birth happens no matter what. A mom, dad, sibling, a baby, most anyone can do that. That's nature. The pain, frustration, the fight, the work -- all the work -- transformed into great love is the miracle. I think that stands for all things in life, surely for family.